Sex and Sexuality

Exchange with the guardians of my Akashic Records about sex and sexuality:

Please offer any insights about sex and the role it plays in relationships over the years?

Sex is an organism’s innate drive to procreate. You see it all around you in nature, and so it is with the human body. In that sense it is a physical quality that expresses at certain intervals, more so when the organism is at the young adult age which is the time when offspring is most likely to be healthy and most likely to be taken care of by healthy parents.

Sexuality is a different quality and has to do with the awareness people have of the sex drive in their bodies. It is one thing to have a sex drive, it is quite another to identify with that sex drive as part of who you are, as part of your identity. That is when the term sexuality is appropriate.

In new relationships sex and sexuality are intertwined, especially between young adults. As a couple grows past their child bearing age their bodies as organisms may show less of a drive for sex. To the extent that sexuality – sex perceived as part of a person’s identity or as the couple’s shared identity – has been more prominent in their experience, will the sex drive have been nurtured and expressed. In that sense it is similar to any other physical drive that people tend to identify with, like caring for the young, preparing food, nurturing company, training and exercising the body, etc. It all has to do with identification. To the extent that sexuality has been less of an item for identification, the drive for sex will diminish as the organism grows older. People in long term relationships tend to find a common ground, a balance, when it comes to having sex and experiencing their sexuality throughout their time together.

Sex and the Way You Feel About It

How does a person know if their sex life is serving their highest good and that of their loved one?

The feeling that the subject evokes gives the indication. If you feel pressured or obliged, or on the other hand thwarted, cut off and limited, those are signs you will need to find a new balance. If you can think about the subjects of sex and sexuality and appreciate other people’s experience with sex and sexuality when it is different from your own, without having a negative opinion or feeling about it, chances are you are at balance.

When it comes to sexuality there isn’t a ‘one size fits all,’ there isn’t a ‘normal’ way to experience it. It all depends on people’s individual assessment of the role of sex and their combined assessment as a couple.

Why People Identify With Sex

Intercourse is a physical expression of the spiritual quality of unity. That is why intercourse can be life giving. Unity is a pure spiritual vibration that can be expressed, felt and experienced in the physical in many ways, one of which is intercourse. Now you see why it is easy to identify with sex and develop sexuality: it is a person’s wish or need to experience the spiritual quality of unity with the one they cherish. Sex, however, is only one way in which unity can be experienced. Depending on their need or wish to experience their unity in the form that sex offers, will a couple engage in sex and will sex become a part of their identity. Therefore, if their need to express unity diminishes, or if the two decide to express their need for unity in a different form, sex will no longer be the avenue through which their unity is experienced. Again, there is no ‘normal.’ Each person and each couple arrives at their own balance, which will change as time goes by.

The Spiritual Intention of Unity

A spiritual intention lies at the basis of each and every expression in the physical. The spiritual intention of unity, for instance, can express in a variety ways – sexual intercourse is not its only option. It could be a get-together, the founding of a charitable foundation, the designing of a company logo, to name just a few. It depends on the given situation and the personal makeup of the people involved. Physical expressions, according to their nature, change and keep on changing. That is how it should be. Can you imagine a still ocean with no movement at all? It is unthinkable. The entire physical realm is in constant flux because of the active intending that is continually ongoing. That’s the beauty of it. There is always room for new expressions. In fact,  this is what attracted the souls to the earth. They were fascinated by the endless possibilities of expressing in the physical.  Next, they forgot the spiritual intention and focused on the physical appearance exclusively. (To read more about that, turn to “Why a Physical Body“.)

Sex and Sexuality

 

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